I had a rough time waking up this morning. The past two nights I have been hours late getting to bed. I see this pattern happen over and over again. I basically get out of sync. It usually starts with me neglecting to do my breathing/meditation exercises. Once this happens it creates a cascade effect. The next to falter is my eating begins to get out of control. When my eating goes bad my energy starts to drop. With less energy, I have trouble getting everything done in a day that I need to, and this, in turn, causes me to neglect my sleep. The sleep deficit feeds back into the vicious cycle and makes everything worse.
I seem to go through cycles. I will have a span of time that I am able to keep my shit together and do all the self-care things that I need to do to maintain my well-being. Then, from time to time, I will slowly lose control until everything just falls apart. I always get back on track, eventually. It’s very frustrating that I operate like this. I try, very hard, to stay level, but invariably I always fail. It’s just the human in me, I guess.
I am currently in one of my downturns. I haven’t lost complete control yet, and I do not intend to. Of course, what I intend doesn’t always happen. I am hoping to get a grip on things before the crash occurs. Self-care is very important. Our bodies and minds are much like machines, and all machines require regular maintenance. Without it, we do break.